32 quotes
Dubstep and Darkness in Deadpool 2
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
You're so dark! You sure you're not from the ]? I love dubstep!
[To Cable; [w:DC Extended Universe|DC Universe]
Rumors and Foreshadowing in the Basement
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
Nobody knows, but rumor has it that they keep a ] in the basement. Right next to huge, steaming hot bowl of foreshadowing.
[[W:Juggernaut (character)|monster; turns to viewer]
Team Tragedy and Mixed Feelings
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
Good news and bad news. Bad news is, the whole team is dead. The good news is, I don't think anyone is gonna miss Shatterstar. He was a bit of a prick.
[after the X-Force team is killed off accidentally in a series of random mishaps]
Deadpool's Frustration with Wolverine's Popularity
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
FUCK ] First he rides my coattails with the R-rating, then the hairy motherfucker ups the ante by ] What a dick! Well, guess what, Wolvie? I'm dying in this one too.
[narrating while he is shown blowing himself up; [w:Wolverine (character)|Wolverine!; [w:Logan (film)|dying!]
Deadpool's Take on Family Films
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
I know what you're thinking: "I'm so glad I left the kiddos at home." But that's where you'd be wrong. That babysitter of yours is high as fuck right now. And believe it or not, Deadpool 2 is a family film. True story. And every good family film starts with a vicious murder. ], ], ]... Holy shit-pickles, that guy's on fire! That's not CGI, folks, he's really on fire. Yeah.
[narrating while executing Russian criminals; [Bambi; [The Lion King; [Saw 3D|Saw 7; a guy on fire runs around screaming]
Dopinder's Ambition for a Dark Career
Dopinder
I want to become a contract killer.
Deadpool
I'm sorry, what did you say?
Dopinder
Remember when I kidnapped Bandhu and threatened him with great violence?
Deadpool
Err, you kind of killed him.
Dopinder
And then remember the movie ]?
[[w:Interview with the Vampire (film)|Interview with the Vampire]
Deadpool
Don't want to.
Dopinder
When ] fed 10-year-old ] blood for the first time, and she looked up at his smooth, handsome face and said "I want some more..." Oh, Pool, picture me, a 10-year-old Kirsten Dunst!
[[w:Tom Cruise|Tom Cruise; [w:Kirsten Dunst|Kirsten Dunst]
Deadpool
...I'll never not picture that. But I can't wait to never speak of this, as soon as possible. We're here.
Deadpool
Dopinder? It's me again. Look, a saner man might discourage you from joining the deadly merc business, what with your concave chest and your paper towel tube arms. But you're an eagle, and goddammit, an eagle's gotta soar! You gotta grab those dreams, grab those dreams by the dick-tip and make it rain!
Dopinder
I don't know what that means.
Deadpool
Me neither!
Deadpool
I'm gonna see you — Boop! — at the office. In the sky.
[taps his nose; under his breath, as he leaves]
Dopinder
You're my Tom Cruise!
Deadpool
And you're my Kristen Dunst! "Kristen"? "Kirsten"?
[to himself]
The Hero's Journey to Rock Bottom
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
In every film, there's a moment when the hero hits rock bottom. In ], it was when ]'s prized bobsled broke. In ], it was when those people signed on to be in that movie. But in this film, well, you're looking at it. Rock, meet bottom.
[[w:Cool Runnings|Cool Runnings; [w:John Candy|John Candy; [w:The Human Centipede (First Sequence)|Human Centipede]
A Call for Silence
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
Zip it, ]! ]
[from trailer; playing with action figures; [w:Thanos|Cable; [Avengers: Infinity War|I got the stones to help you!; teabags Cable's action figure with Deadpool's action figure]
Cable's Frustration with Deadpool's Actions
Nathan Summers / Cable
Your ]'s up, you dumbass/dumbfuck.
[from trailer; [Time|time]
Commentary on Artwork and Social Commentary
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
All these elderly white men on the walls. Should have brought my rape whistle. ]?] Those were already damaged after they fell there!
[while going around the X-Mansion using Professor X's wheelchair; ''in the Super Duper Cut:'' All these old guys on the wall. Who lives here, [[w:Calista Flockhart|Calista Flockhart; chuckles and knocks busts onto the floor, breaking them]
A Reflection on Humor and Struggle
Nathan Summers / Cable
You remind me of my wife. She always struggled. But she was funny, and filtered her pain through the prism of humor. Something I could never master.
[...]
Frustration Over Incomplete Visual Effects
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
What... in the actual ass?! DALE! W-why are the visual effects not done?! It's a metal arm! It's not like ]
[from trailer, at Cable's incomplete intro; [Justice League (film)| we're trying to remove a mustache!]
Time Travel and Its Challenges
Nathan Summers / Cable
I use a device to slide through time. The longer I travel, the harder it is to control. I got two charges: one to get me here, one to get me home.
Generational Patterns and Personal Choices
Deadpool
Family was always an F-word to me. My pile-of-shit father took off and bailed. I mean, it's not like I have a lot of strong role models to draw off of for Todd.
Vanessa
Hey, look at me. You are not your father. Besides... I will never, ever let our child be named Todd.
Deadpool
But here's the thing – isn't that how it always works? Like in ], men are destined to become their father, and have consensual sex with their sister?
[[w:Star Wars|Star Wars]
Vanessa
I think you missed big, big chunks of that movie.
Deadpool
No, I'm pretty sure ] nailed ].
[[w:Luke Skywalker|Luke; [w:Princess Leia|her]
Vanessa
Baby, that's ]. The point is, kids... they give us a chance to be better than we are. Better than we used to be.
[[w:The Empire Strikes Back|Empire]
Deadpool
You're a lot smarter than I look.
Unforeseen Outcomes and Unexpected Alliances
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
I'll be the first to admit: this did not go according to plan. I'll also be the first to admit that that plan was written in crayon. Looks like Russell found a new friend. Turns out Domino is a bit of a badass and maybe possibly mildly lucky. But Cable, yeesh, that guy's in the mood. A mood that is about to get significantly worse.
Suspicious Similarities in Sounds and Recognition
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
Is it just me or does "]" from ] sound suspiciously like "]" from ]? "Papa, can you hear me?" And nobody fucking realizes it.
[[w:Do You Want to Build a Snowman?|Do You Want to Build a Snowman?; [Frozen (2013 film)|Frozen; [w:Papa, Can You Hear Me?|Papa, Can You Hear Me?; [w:Yentl (film)|Yentl; singing; spoken]
Loss and Home in Cable's Reflection
Nathan Summers / Cable
He came into my home and took the only thing that made it a home. Sound familiar?
[referring to Future Firefist]
Humorous Banter Between Deadpool and Firefist
Deadpool
Hi there!
Firefist
Stay back or ] dies!
[pointing at Negasonic Teenage Warhead; [w:Justin Bieber|Justin Bieber]
Deadpool
Ha! Justin Bieber. He called you Justin Bieber.
Naming Our Kid Cher: A Humorous Moment
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
I hope you sharpened the cream cheese spreader. I'll be right back. We're definitely naming our kid Cher! WOOOOO!
[throws the spreader onto a criminal who's about to shoot Vanessa, successfully killing him; uses Cable's time-travelling device; to Vanessa]
The Meaning of Family in Unlikely Places
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
What do you get when you take eight feet of chrome, one pinch of courage, a cup of good luck, a dab of racism, a splash of diabetes, and a wheelbarrow full of Stage 4 Cancer? Answer: a family. See? I didn't lie what kinda film this was. If there's anything you need to take away today, other than the need to Google "What the fuck is dubstep?", it's that we all need to belong to someone.
Lessons from Pain and Chaos
Vanessa
Kiss me like you miss me, Red.
Blind Al
Listen to the pain. It's both a history teacher and fortune teller. Pain teaches us who we are, Wade. Sometimes, it's so bad, we feel like we're dying. But we can't really live til we've died a little, can we?
Weasel
There you go, little fella. Go on, you're doing it! My beautiful, hairless, Twizzler-legged baby boy.
Juggernaut
Let's Fuck Some Shit Up" is my legal middle name.
Threat of Violence in a Dark Context
Nathan Summers / Cable
When this is over, I'm gonna fuck you to death with your own broken feet.
Confronting Racism and Revenge in Deadpool 2
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
YOU KILLED BLACK TOM, YOU RACIST SON OF A BITCH!
[after Cable shoots Black Tom Cassidy]
Questioning the Concept of Luck Powers
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
Seriously, I don't get it! What, you shoot luck lasers out your eyes? It's just hard to picture, and certainly not very cinematic. I mean, luck? What coked-out, glass pipe-sucking freakshow comic book artist came up with that little chestnut?! Probably ]
[to Domino via commlink; [w:Rob Liefeld|a guy who can't draw feet!; all the while, Domino is running through traffic while a series of accidents happen around her without harming her]
Intercept the Convoy, Grab the Boy
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
You all know the plan. Intercept the convoy, grab the boy, but not inappropriately!
[planning to rescue Firefist with the X-Force team]
Frustration with Absence of Supportive Characters
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
What am I supposed to do around here, anyway? Sit in a share circle, talk about my feelings? And how would I do that, exactly, cause... where the heck is everyone? It's always just you and Negasonic Teenage-Longest-Name-Ever- I said no touching. What the... fuck! You'd think the ] would throw us a bone – one that doesn't end up in my mouth. The ] made more money than the guy who invented pants. But they can't just dust off one of the famous X-Men? How bout ] What do those do anyway, huh? ], ], ], ], ] and ] are actually in an adjoining room. Beast quickly closes the door without Wade noticing] Carry him three feet off the ground to snatch up the nearest muffin crumb? No, no, no, no, no. No.
[riding around the X-Mansion on Professor X's wheelchair; '''Colossus (grabbing Wade by the shoulder)''': Enough!; Colossus throws him off the wheelchair and onto the floor; [w:20th Century Fox|studio; [w:Deadpool (film)|first movie; [w:Warren Worthington III|that putz with the giant pigeon wings?; cut to behind Wade; [[w:Cyclops (Marvel Comics)|Cyclops; [w:Storm (Marvel Comics)|Storm; [w:Nightcrawler (comics)|Nightcrawler; [w:Beast (comics)|Beast; [w:Quicksilver (comics)|Quicksilver; [w:Professor X|Professor X]
Isolation and Survival in Deadpool's Reality
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
We're not partners or friends. This doesn't end with us riding into the sunset, it ends with me dying of cancer, and you winning the Ice Box award for softest mouth. There's only one person in this world that I care about, and she's gone. You wanna survive? Stop trying to shank the biggest guys in here, and make friends with them. Make friends with someone. Anyone but me. Maybe even Black Tim... Black Evan? I don't know. All I remember is, he was African-American.
[after Firefist starts a fight in the Ice Box]
Facing Challenges Head-On
Wade Wilson / Deadpool
Give me ] best shot, ].
[[w:Josh Brolin|your; [w:The Goonies|One-Eyed Willie]
A Conversation About Change and Acceptance
Deadpool
Why can't I just die?
Colossus
Take your mask off, Wade. We must talk. You need fresh start. With train, you can be X-Man.
[Deadpool does so]
Deadpool
You're wasting your time, Shiny Jesus. I'm not X-Men material.
Negasonic Teenage Warhead
Understatement of the year. Wade, Yukio. Yukio, Wade.
[enters the room with Yukio; Yukio waves at Deadpool]
Deadpool
What in the fuck-knuckles is this?
Negasonic Teenage Warhead
She's my girlfriend, you intolerant shit.
Deadpool
Whoa! Pump the hate brakes, ]! I'm just surprised anyone would date you, especially Pinkie Pie from ].
[[w:Fox & Friends|Fox & Friends; [w:My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic|My Little Pony; winks at Yukio]
Yukio
I like this guy!
[smiling]
Negasonic Teenage Warhead
Give him a chance. It's great seeing you like this.
[to Deadpool]
Deadpool
Yeah.
[laughs]
Yukio
Bye, Wade.
[leaves the room with Negasonic Teenage Warhead; waves back]