Boogie Nights Quotes

Jack Horner I got a feeling that behind those jeans is something wonderful just waiting to get out.

Jack Horner But you gotta get the people in the theater. You know, you need ]...

Amber Waves Uh oh, here we go.

Jack Horner How do you keep them in the theater after they've ]? The beauty and the acting. No, I understand you've got to get em in the theater. You know, you've got to get the seats full. But I don't want to make a film where they show up, they sit down, they jack off, and they get up and they get out before the story ends. It is my dream, it is my goal, it is my idea to make a film where the story just sucks them in. And when they spurt out that ], they've got to just sit in it. They can't move until they find out how the story ends. You know, I want to make a film like that. And I understand, they have to make films...I've made them myself, you know where there's a few laughs, everyone fucks their brains out. And that's fine. But it's my dream to make a film that is true and right and dramatic.

Taglines Everyone has one special thing.

Reed Rothchild Let's go get some of that Saturday night beaver.

Jack Horner We're about to make film history, right here... on videotape.

Jack Horner Alright, you didn't know how old she was, and you just brought her back to your place, that's all. You didn't do anything.

Colonel James No.

Jack Horner You didn't do anything, right?

Colonel James No! You know me, Jack.

Jack Horner Alright.

Colonel James It's just...they found ] at the house.

Jack Horner What?

Colonel James Well, it's just...it's my fucking weakness, Jack. ]

Jack Horner Ah, Jesus...

Colonel James I don't touch them, Jack! I don't touch them in any way! Now you think I'm an asshole. Now, I love you, Jack, you know that. Now, there's just one thing I wanna know. Are you gonna be my friend? Are you my friend, Jack?

Jack Horner Alright.

Eddie Adams/Dirk Diggler You don't know what I can do! You don't know what I can do, what I'm gonna do, or what I'm gonna be! You don't know I'm good! I have good things that you don't know about! I'm gonna be something! I am! And don't fucking tell me I'm not!

Jack Horner The Colonel here puts up all the money for our films. It's an important part of the process.

Eddie Adams Great.

Colonel James I'm looking forward to seeing you in action. Jack says you've got a great big cock.

Eddie Adams Well, I don't know, I guess so.

Colonel James May I see it?

Eddie Adams Really?

Colonel James Please!

Colonel James Thank you, Eddie.

Eddie Adams No problem.

Dirk Diggler Look, man, all we need is the tapes, alright?

Record Producer No. You don't get the tapes until you've paid.

Dirk Diggler In our situation, that doesn't make any fucking sense.

Reed Rothchild Look, we cannot pay for the tapes unless we take the tapes to the record company and get paid.

Dirk Diggler Hello? Exactly.

Record Producer That's not an MP, that's a YP, your problem. Come up with the money, or forget it.

Reed Rothchild Okay, now you're talking above my head. I don't know all of this industry jargon, YP, MP, whatever. All I know is that I can't get a record contract, we cannot get a record contract unless we take those tapes to the record company. And granted, the tapes themselves are a uh um oh, you own them, all right, but the magic that is on those tapes. That fucking heart and soul that we put onto those tapes, that is ours and you don't own that. Now I need to take that magic and get it over the record company. And they're waiting for us, we were supposed to be there a half hour ago. We look like assholes, man.

Dirk Diggler Let me explain to him in simple arithmetic. One, two three! Because you don't fuckin get it, Burt! You give us the tapes, we get the record contract, we come back and give you your fuckin money. Have you heard the tapes? Have you even heard them? We're guaranteed a record deal. Our stuff is that good!

Record Producer Now I get it. Now I understand. You want it to happen...but it's not going to happen. Because it's a Catch-22.

Dirk Diggler What the fuck does that mean? What is a Catch-22, Burt?

Record Producer Catch-22, gentlemen. Think about it.

Dirk Diggler You know what I'm thinking about, man? I'm thinking about kicking some fuckin ass!

Eddie Adams Jack, I was thinking about my name, y'know?

Jack Horner Yeah?

Eddie Adams I was wondering if you had any ideas.

Jack Horner I've got a few, but you tell me.

Eddie Adams Well, my idea was, y'know, I want a name, I want it so it can cut glass, y'know, razor sharp.

Jack Horner Tell me.

Eddie Adams When I close my eyes, I see this thing. A sign. I see this name in bright blue neon lights with a purple outline. And this name is so bright and so sharp that the sign...it just blows up because the name is so powerful. It says, "Dirk Diggler." What do you think?

Jack Horner I think...that's a great name.

Young Stud This is TWICE in two days that a chick has ] on me!

Colonel James Well, do you think this means that maybe ya oughta think about getting some new shit? Whaddya think?

Young Stud Yes, sir.

Jessie St. Vincent I could die of starvation before I get something in my mouth.

Dirk Diggler You still hungry?

Jessie St. Vincent Starving.

Dirk Diggler Why don't you feast on that?

Eddie Adams/Dirk Diggler I've been around this block twice now looking for something - a clue. Been looking for clues and something led me back here, yeah, so here I am. Could've been me who was at Ringo's place when the shit went down. Hey, I know how it is, I've been there. We've all done bad things. We've all had those guilty feelings in our hearts. You wanna take your brain out of your head and wash it and scrub it and make it clean. Well, no, but I'm gonna help you settle this. First we're gonna check for holes and see what we can find. Then, we're gonna get nice and wet, so you're gonna spread your legs. Oh, that's good, so you know me, you know my reputation. Thirteen inches is a tough load, I don't treat you gently. That's right. I'm Brock Landers. So I'm gonna be nice, and I'm gonna ask you one more time: where the fuck is Ringo?" I'm a star. I'm a star, I'm a star, I'm a star. I am a big, bright shining star. Yeah, that's right.

Amber Waves I miss my two sons, you know. I miss my little Andrew... and I miss my Dirk. I always felt like Dirk was my baby. My new baby. Don't you miss Dirk?

Rollergirl Yeah.

Amber Waves He's so fucking talented, the bastard. You know, I just...I love him, Rollergirl. I really love the stupid jerk.

Rollergirl I love you, Mom. I want you to be my mom, Amber. Are you my mom? I'll just...I'll ask you if you're my mom, and you say yes, okay? Are you my mom?

Amber Waves Yes, honey. Yes, yes.

Amber Waves What are you looking at?

Jack Horner I'm looking at you.

Amber Waves You're staring.

Jack Horner You know what I'm staring at? I'm staring at the foxiest bitch in the whole world.

Reed Rothchild Want to hear a poem I wrote? "I love you, you love me. Going down the sugar tree. We'll go down the sugar tree, and see lots of bees. Playing. Playing. But the bees won't sting, because you love me." That's it.

Eddie Adams/Dirk Diggler You're not the boss of me, Jack. You're not the king of Dirk. I'm the boss of me. I'm the king of me. I'm Dirk Diggler. I'm the star. It's my big dick and I say when we roll. You know what? I'm the biggest star here, man. That's the way it is! I want to fuck! It's my big dick! So, everybody get ready fuckin NOW!

Eddie Adams/Dirk Diggler What can you expect when you're on top? You know? It's like ]. When he was the king, you know, people were just constantly trying to conquer him, you know, in the ]. So, it's history repeating itself all over again.

Taglines The life of a dreamer, the days of a business, and the nights in between.

Floyd Gondolli This is the future. Videotape tells the truth.

Jack Horner Wait a minute. You come into my house, my party, to tell me about the future? That the future is tape, videotape, and not film? That it's amateurs and not professionals? I'm a filmmaker, which is why I will never make a movie on tape. I'll tell you something else. I will never, ever loan out any of the actors that I have under contract.

Floyd Gondolli Wait, Jack, I'm not a complicated man. I like cinema. In particular, I like to see people fucking on film. But I don't want to win an Oscar, and I don't want to reinvent the wheel. I like simple pleasures...like butter in my ass, lollipops in my mouth. That's just me. That's just something that I enjoy. Call me crazy, call me a pervert, but there's one little thing I want to do in this life, and that is to make a dollar and a cent in this business. I'm not trying to hurt you. I'm trying to help you stay one step ahead of the game.