Con Air Quotes

Cyrus the Virus Say there was a disturbance, but you've got it under control. Say it, or I will kill you.

Pilot Without me, you got nobody to fly the plane.

Cyrus I never think that far ahead.

Cyrus the Virus Thanks, Poe. You've proven to be a most useful mammal.

Cameron Poe Many hands make light work." My daddy taught me that.

Cyrus You know what my daddy taught me?

Poe What's that?

Cyrus Nothin'.

Poe Self-educated man.

Cyrus Good, now here are the rules, I'm going to ask a question and then you will ask a question.

Larkin Okay... What's your question?

Cyrus In Carson City, your boys were onto us; how?

Malloy One of the guards-

Larkin One of the guards faked a heart attack and we had to remove his restraints, okay?

Cyrus Alright, now what's your question?

Larkin Where are you going with my plane, Cyrus?

Cyrus We're going to Disneyland.

Larkin You're lying, Cyrus.

Cyrus So are you, Vince. Ohh... nothing makes me sadder than the agent lost his bladder in the... aaaiirrrplane.

Guard Falzon Well, welcome aboard. My, my; as I look around I see a lot of celebrities among us. I see eleven Current Affairs, two ] and a genuine ] interviewee, but I gotta tell you gentlemen, none of this impresses me. Because we have rules on this aircraft and they're going to be enforced. It's a lot like kindergarten. You'll keep your hands to yourself, keep the decibel level down and, if any of you should feel the need to scream, spit, or bite, you get the treatment.

Inmate Fuck you, pig.

Guard Falzon Gag and bag this Nazi muffin. You see, this kind of thing puts me in a foul mood. These rules will be enforced because I can't have trouble. If any of you so much as pass gas in my general direction, upsetting my delicate nasal passages, your testicles will become my personal property. That's pretty clear. Good.

Cameron Poe Put the bunny back in the box.

Cyrus Considering my audience, I'm gonna make this very quick and very simple. This is the boneyard. This is the hangar. This is our plane.

Viking What's that?

Cyrus That's a rock.

Viking Okay.

Cyrus The convoy will enter the boneyard here. Initially, we take out the first car , then we take out the last, creating a trap... an air-tight cage filled with lots and lots of dead people. Nathan, get everybody in position, yeah? And bring me those propane tanks!

Taglines Welcome to Con Air.

Johnny "Johnny 23" Baca Shit, that's Garland Greene, man.

Cameron Poe The Marietta Mangler.

Mike "Baby O" O'Dell That skinny little man butchered thirty-some people up and down the eastern seaboard. They say the way he killed those people makes the ] look like ]!

Poe Well...he's on the right flight.

Garland Greene Two went down. One came up.

Poe Wasn't my fault.

Garland Well, you don't have to tell me. Most murders are crimes of necessity rather than desire. But the great ones... ], ], ]... they did it because it excited them.

Poe Don't you... I got nothing in common with them — with you! Don't you talk to me! They were insane!

Garland Now you're talking semantics. What if I told you insane was working a 50-hour week for 50 years, at the end of which they tell you to piss off. Ending up in some retirement village, hoping to die rather than suffering the indignity of trying to make it to the toilet on time. Wouldn't you consider that to be insane?

Poe Murdering 30 people, semantics or not, is insane.

Garland One girl, I drove through three states wearing her head as a hat.

Poe It's my daughter's birthday, so please feel free not to share everything with me.

Taglines Get Ready to Fly.

Garland Greene He's a font of misplaced rage. Name your cliche: Mother held him too much or not enough, last picked at kickball, late night sneaky uncle, whatever. Now, he gets so angry, moments of levity actually cause him pain, gives him headaches. Happiness, for that gentleman, hurts.

U.S. Marshal Vince Larkin This one's done it all. Kidnapping, robbery, murder, extortion. His name is Cyrus Grissom, AKA "Cyrus the Virus." Thirty-nine years old, 25 of them spent in our institutions. But he's bettered himself inside. Earned two degrees, including his juris doctorate. He's also killed 11 fellow inmates, incited three riots, and escaped twice. Likes to brag that he's killed more men than cancer. Cyrus is a poster child for the criminally insane. He's a true product of the system.

Taglines They were deadly on the ground. Now they have wings.

Taglines One wrong flight can ruin your whole day.

Cameron Poe They somehow managed to get every freak and creep in the universe on this one plane, and then somehow managed to let them take it over, and then they somehow managed to stick us right smack in the middle.

Taglines Buckle Up!

Garland Greene Define irony: a bunch of idiots dancing on a plane to a song made famous by a band that died in a plane crash.