22 quotes
Unexpected Sounds in a Quiet Space
Marv
I think there's somebody here.
[whispering]
Vera
Anybody in here?
[yells]
Marv
Well not now. Shhhh.
Vera
You shhhhhhhh.
Marv
SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Christmas Chaos at Home Alone 4
Kevin
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.
Molly
Good night. (Mr. Prescott hits her with a tray and she falls down) Aaaaaahhh!
Kevin
Mr. Prescott!
[gasps]
Prescott
At your service.
[to Kevin]
Kevin
Boy, am I glad to see you.
Prescott
Perhaps we should call the police.
Kevin
Good idea, Mr. Prescott.
Prescott
Just "Prescott" to you.
Kevin
Prescott"!
Control and Boundaries in a Household
Prescott
Can you read? The door. "No Entry.
Kevin
What, does that mean me?
Prescott
Especially you. This is the control center from which I manage this entire household, as well as my personal quarters. Miss Natalie may have granted you run of her home, but this is my domain and strictly off-limits. Understood? Any more questions? Good.
Prison Perks: Salisbury Steak on Wednesdays
Marv Merchants
Well, prison isn't so bad. We do get Salisbury steak on Wednesdays.
The Complexity of Job Loyalty
Kevin
I don't understand. If they were so mean to you how come you never quit working for them?
Mr. Prescott
I know you are young and that is the most obvious solution, but jobs are not always easy to find.
Consequences of Uninvited Intrusion
Prescott
What are you doing here? Tell me.
Kevin
I, uh, I... Nothing. I swear. I thought all of this was cool. I wanted to take a look at it.
Prescott
You don't go to other people's homes uninvited, and you don't touch their things. Didn't I warn you what would happen if I ever caught you in here again?
Kevin
Not specifically.
Prescott
Trust me. It won't be pleasant. What do you want?
Molly
I thought I heard the boy. Ah! And indeed I did. I don't want him bothering you anymore, so I'll just get him out of your way. Come along, Kevin. He'll be my responsibility from now on.
Burglars Targeting Homes in Kevin's Story
Peter
Kevin, what happened?
Kevin
It wasn't me. It was the burglars.
Peter
The burglars?
Kevin
Yeah, and I recognized the one guy, Marv. Did I ever tell you about him? Well, that's another story. But the point is, they were gonna rip off your house!
Natalie
So you chose instead to trash it?
Kevin
No, I was trying to protect it!
Natalie
By trashing it?
Prescott
What in the name of...?
Kevin
Hey, why didn't you come when I was calling you?
Natalie
Prescott, were you aware of any burglars here today?
Prescott
Burglars? No, ma'am. All the alarms were on as usual.
Kevin
Well, maybe they turned them off. They had one of these, you know.
Prescott
I saw no intruders, and except for... beg your pardon, ma'am, the briefest of all bathroom breaks, my eyes were on the monitors at all times. How one child could do so much damage in the time it took me to... Well, it's quite beyond me.
Kevin
It wasn't me!
Prescott
Well, there was no one else here!
Kevin
He's lying!?
Prescott
I am not!
Kevin
Are too!
Prescott
Am not!
Kevin
Are too!
Prescott
With all due respect, sir, I did see Master Kevin playing with the devices as if the house were a big toy. The only hooligan here today was your son.
Suspicion and Danger in Home Alone 4
Kevin
I'm not lying. The bad guys are back.
Natalie
We're not getting anywhere.
Peter
Kevin, I spoke to all the caterers and to Molly. Nobody saw a thing but you. Now, how could that be?
Kevin
I don't know. But I heard they're gonna kidnap the prince.
Peter
You heard them say that?
Kevin
Yeah, with my Super Spy bugging device. And Prescott's involved with the whole thing.
Natalie
This is absurd. I'm going to call and make sure the royal family's flight is okay for tomorrow.
Peter
Kevin, I know what's going on here.
Kevin
You do?
Peter
Yeah. You're out to destroy my relationship with Natalie.
Kevin
What?
Peter
You knew how important tonight was to her, and you went and pulled a crazy stunt like this.
Kevin
That's not the truth.
Peter
I've given you a lot of leeway because I know how tough this divorce has been on you. But tonight you went way too far. I want you to go to your room and think about what you've done. And when you're ready to apologize to Natalie, then we'll talk.
Urgent Need for Bathroom Break
Vera
Marv, I gotta pee.
Marv
Vera, you can pee next week.
Tension Among Characters in Home Alone 4
Vera
Hi, Molly?
Molly
GET IN THERE!!!
Vera
Marv, are you there?!
Radio
Shut up, Vera.
Vera
Well, okay. I was just trying to--
Radio
Shut up, you moron.
Vera
Hey, I'm no moron, you jerk!?
Radio
Shut up, you bag!
Vera
Door, open!
Marv
What's wrong with YOU?!
Vera
What's wrong with YOU?! I'm no bag! And you know what? You ain't no genius!
Marv
Vera, honey...
Vera
No, don't "Vera, honey" me!
Marv
Honey...
Vera
You're not even as smart as this kid, who, in case you hadn't noticed, is totally kicking our butts! Well, from now on, I am my own boss!
Marv
Vera. Vera, honey...
Vera
Don't "honey" me!
Marv
Pumpkin. Pumpkin.
Molly
Marv! Forget about her! Get the kid! I'll be outta here in a few minutes.
Kevin's Holiday Wish for Everyone
Kevin McCallister
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.
Embracing the Inner Child in Adulthood
Dad
Just because you grow up on the outside doesn't mean you want to stop having fun enjoying life.
Kevin
I know all about the inner child dad.
Peter
You do, huh?
Kevin
That's why old guys drive sports cars.
Peter
You're probably right.
Kevin
But the trouble with sports cars, there's no room for anybody else maybe one other person max. But if you want to take a real road trip luggage and all you don’t even have room for a friend I mean there cool and fast and all but who wants to be in a nice car when you're all alone.
Prison Life Humor in Home Alone 4
Marv
Oh, come on. No, prison's not so bad.
Vera
Oh yeah?
Marv
Yeah, on Thursdays, you get Salisbury steak.
Vera
Yeah, I know about prison. That's where I met you.
Marv
Calm down. Calm down.
Vera
You calm down!?
Marv
Women, eh?
[to officer]
Officer
Yeah.
Vera
Hey, don't touch me!
Natalie
Peter, what's he done now?!
Peter
Well, he saved the day, that's what. You should be thanking him.
Natalie
Molly?! What in the world is going on?!
Detective
It seems that they were gonna kidnap the prince. Best we can gather, she's the boss.
Natalie
She's MY maid! I'm HER boss!
[shocked]
Kevin
Well, looks like you're gonna have to find a new maid.
Prescott
And a new butler, I'm afraid. I resign.
Natalie
Resign?! But why?!
Prescott
Because as a wise young man once said, "Life's too short.