Stranger Than Fiction Quotes

Karen P. Eiffel We're imagining car wrecks!

Jules Hilbert No one wants to die Harold, unfortunately we do. Harold, Harold listen to me. Harold, you will die, some day, some time; heart failure at the bank, choke on a mint. Some long drawn-out disease you've contracted on vacation, you will die. You will absolutely die. Even if you avoid this death, another will find you. And I guarantee, that it won't be nearly as poetic or as meaningful as what she's written. I'm sorry but it's ... it's the nature of all tragedies Harold. The hero dies, and the story goes on forever.

Karen P. Eiffel This is a story about a man named Harold Crick. And his wristwatch.

Karen P. Eiffel Like anything worth writing, it came inexplicably and without method.

Harold Crick I brought you flours.

Jules Hilbert Harold, if you pause to think, you'd realize that that answer is inextricably contingent upon the type of life being led... and, of course, the quality of the pancakes.

Jules Hilbert Aren't you relieved to know you're not a Golem?

Harold Crick Alright, who just said "Harold just counted brush strokes"?

Jules Hilbert Little did he know', That means there's something he doesn't know, which means there's something you don't know, did you know that?

Harold Crick SHUT UP! No I'm not. I'm cursing you stupid voice; so shut up and leave me alone!

Ana Pascal Get bent, taxman!

Karen P. Eiffel Harold Crick was a man of ] ], endless calculations and incredibly few ].

Jules Hilbert * To Harold

Karen P. Eiffel Pneumonia. That's an interesting way to die.

Karen P. Eiffel Little did he know that this simple, seemingly innocuous act would result in his imminent death.

Karen P. Eiffel Is this a joke?

Karen P. Eiffel Everyone thinks about leaping off a building.

Jules Hilbert * To Harold

Karen P. Eiffel As much as I would like to, I simply cannot throw Harold Crick off a building.

Harold Crick This may sound like gibberish, but I think I'm in a tragedy.

Jules Hilbert Meeting an insurance agent the day your policy runs out is coincidence. Getting a letter from the Emperor saying he's visiting is plot. Having your apartment eaten by a wrecking ball ... is something else entirely. Harold, you don't control your fate.

Jules Hilbert You have to die. It's a masterpiece.

Jules Hilbert It's been a very revealing 10 seconds.

Harold Crick I am relieved to know I am not a ].

Karen P. Eiffel Sometimes, when we lose ourselves in fear and despair, in routine and constancy... in hopelessness and tragedy, we can thank God for Bavarian sugar cookies. And fortunately when there aren't any cookies, we can still find reassurance in a familiar hand on our skin... or a kind and loving gesture... or a subtle encouragement... or a loving embrace or an offert of comfort. Not to mention hospital gurneys and nose plugs... and uneaten Danish... and soft-spoken secrets... and Fender Stratocasters... and maybe the occasional piece of fiction. And we must remember that all these things, the nuances, the anomalies, the subtleties, which we assume only accessorize our days, are, in fact, here for a much larger and nobler cause: They are here to save our lives. I know the idea seems strange. But i also know that it just so happens to be true.

Ana Pascal Apology accepted. But only because you stammered.

Harold Crick The cookies were good. Thank you for forcing me to eat them.

Karen P. Eiffel I don't need a nicotine patch, Penny; I smoke cigarettes.

Karen P. Eiffel And although this was an extraordinary day—a day to be remembered for the rest of Harold's life — Harold just thought it was a Wednesday.

Harold Crick I left my thimble and Socialist reading material at home.